I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize