O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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