Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
