That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
