i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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