Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Randomize
