He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
