You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize