Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
