Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I was not drunk enough for that final.
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