Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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