Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
