You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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