when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
