What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
