He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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