I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
