I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Randomize
