and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
