you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Randomize
