I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
