3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
