he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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