can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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