If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize