I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
