OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I just want to make out with him forever
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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