You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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