Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
