but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
