i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
