The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
