I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
You have to summon your inner elephant
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
