hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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