I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
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