I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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