Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
