So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
