oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
