I wish I could teleport
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
