this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
