you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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