i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
