Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
