I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Randomize
