is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize