i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
