Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
