Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
