Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
